4 months!

Today I have been a mom to 4 kids for 4 months! Time sure does fly by! Things are still pretty slow around here. I don't do too much during the day, especially when Jar is at work. I think in 2 more months we will be able to do things a bit more. The boys will be able to sit up and chew on snacks and hold onto toys by then, so it should make it a bit easier to go out and about for more than an hour at a time.

I don't remember the last time I blogged.....I don't remember much lately though, so I might repeat some stuff. Oh well.

The last couple of months have flown by. Jar had surgery last month. He got to stay home for Christmas. He was supposed to work it, but he was home recovering instead. It was nice. We were gone for a week spending time with both of our families. It was fun, but by the end I was done. I think I am still recovering from it! Seriously though, it has taken a long time to get back into things.

Mackinley is an amazing little helper. I can count on her to help with the boys, the house, groceries, you name it. She is great! I was sad to see her go back to school after the holidays, but it was nice to get back into a routine.

Macey had some setbacks the last little while. I figure it had a lot to do with Jar being home for 5 weeks and then having Mackie home for 2 during the holidays. Her tantrums were becoming more and more frequent. My patience grew thinner and thinner. Once things got back to normal, and there was no one else but mom around, she slowly started to go back to being a bit more happier. We've made huge progress actually this last week, so we'll see how it lasts when dad gets home tomorrow.

The boys are growing so much! I really want to get them weighed. They get their 4 month shots in a couple of weeks, but I would love to know now! They are so happy. They are starting to be a bit more fun. They smile and laugh and they are starting to grab at things a bit now. They both love to suck on their fingers/thumb. They won't take a nummers (soother), which is really frustrating for me! They both like to have it in their mouth to play with, but not suck on. I've been trying for 4 months and have tried 5 different kinds too! Oh well. I guess I won't have to wean them off of them in the end and I won't have photos or videos with nummers in the way. They are both pretty close to rolling from their backs to their tummies as well. Slow down babies!

As for myself, well, I am just being a mom. I am still on the couch a lot with the boys. Two more months, two more months, two more months. Hopefully not even that much! As much as I don't want them to get older, I am really looking forward to them sitting up on their own and playing. My life will be so much easier. Maybe not easier, but getting things done around the house will be easier. I might actually start losing weight once I am able to do a bit more out and about! Wouldn't that be nice. I am not trying to get anybody to tell me that I look good or anything. I really am okay with how I am. I realize I just made 2 babies at once. I know the weight will come off eventually, but come on! They are 4 months old and I am exclusively nursing them and nothing? I actually put on some weight after they have been born. I dropped a lot the first 2 weeks and then it slowly started creeping up and it has stopped. My problem is that nursing two babies has made me extremely hungry and thirsty all of the time. I am NEVER full. Ever. It's insane. So that obviously doesn't help. Especially since I don't have the best eating habits right now. I want to eat healthy, but I need quick and convenient and most of the time healthy food isn't. I wonder sometimes if nursing twins is actually making my body retain the fat so I stay healthy enough to be able to do it. I know some girls that don't lose weight until they stop nursing. I was never like that though with the girls, but who knows. I also don't get to exercise that often. I have tried and it felt good, but it takes a lot of time to do it the way I want to and it is hard to do it with two babies. For some reason, that extra baby makes things just a wee bit more difficult. Like I said, I am okay - just okay - with how I look. My main problem is not having clothes that fit. Most of my clothes I can wear, but they are tight and show all of my lines. You know, the lines under the bra, the lines above the pants, or the more familiar term muffin top. I hate lines! I really need to buy clothes that fit. I would be super happy if I had a new wardrobe to fit the new me. If I am going to buy a whole new wardrobe though, I need to go to the states to do it. I'm hoping we get to go in 2 weeks. We better. I'd rather be the new me and have these 2 awesome boys, then be my old self and no babies. I can' remember what life was like without them. They make our family complete. For now anyways. :)

So that's the last little bit of our lives. We are happy. Things are good. Sometimes too good. When I stop and think at how awesome life has been the last little while, I get afraid of what must be coming our way. It never stays that way for long. Oh well, I am enjoying it while it lasts! We may not have the nicest house or the nicest things. We may not get to travel all over. We might not have a lot of different things, but we have each other. We have a family of 6! I have a husband who loves me. We get the bills paid. We want for nothing. I have freaking cute kids. We have awesome families....a great support system! Jar has a great job that allows me to be a stay at home mom. It's what I always wanted to be. I am living my dream!